For a long time, we didn’t know what made us being many. Nothing made sense, something hurt, I am not alone in my head. This a scary and painful situation and it doesn’t go away. For years and years we hit this point over and over again until we couldn’t take it anymore. As to not be swallowed by despair, we gave up thinking about it and put the issue in the hands of god – or to who- or whatever might be deciding about those kind of things.
It seems like it worked somehow. It took a few years and a bit more struggling but things changed. Now, when we hit what was a dead-end before, we can actually see how sad it is that our young versions had to go through such difficult times. The impossible problem they were facing, far too young to solve it.
And this sadness and grief is such a relief!
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